“Why, oh why, oh WHY?”

It’s the morning after, and most of us (at least in the US) have leftover Turkey, and some questions to usher in the upcoming New Year.

First tip:  Reheat the turkey in a covered pan in the oven and serve with sautéed onions- it will taste a thousand times better than microwaved leftovers.

Second tip:  This one is about food for thought, not food for the body:

“Why, oh why, oh WHY?”

The gears in our minds work by asking questions.

In the spirit of the season, here’s an idea:  Let’s flip our questions around!

What does that mean?

Most people ask, “Why am I not as wealthy as she is?” or, “Why isn’t my spouse as considerate as his?” or, “Why aren’t my kids as well-behaved as theirs are?” or, “Why is it so hard to lose weight?”

Food for thought- FLIP THE QUESTIONS 180 DEGREES!

Ask yourself:  “Why am I as wealthy as I am?”  No matter how terrible your financial situation, in many ways we are all far richer than kings and queens of centuries passed.  We have indoor plumbing (Even King Louis VIII had an outhouse!), washers and dryers, and host of electronic appliances and communication tools.

Another question to ask:  “Why is my spouse as considerate as she/he is?”  As we all know that things can be infinitely worse than they are… as we’ve heard on the news all too often!

Flip your questions to asking yourself why your life is as WONDERFUL as it is, not as terrible as it is!

The law of attraction states that, “What we focus on, expands; what we avoid focusing on, contracts.”

Teenage girls have a unique ability to see what is NOT there.  They can stand in front of a closet bursting with clothes and lament, “I have nothing to wear!”  Teen boys display a similar ability in front of a bountiful refrigerator, complaining, “There’s nothing to eat!”

An attitude of gratitude means shifting our questions from “average” questions of “why not” to a superior mode of thinking.  Let us commit to asking “why yes” questions and watch the blessings in our lives multiply a thousandfold!

Related Posts:


  1. Thank you Ellen, for another thought-provoking article just when I needed it most!

    Wendy, IL

  2. What a profound way to look at the world- our thoughts and questions truly impact our lives.

    Happy black Friday shopping, everyone:)


  3. I like that. But how would we help the teenage girl/boy to reframe their comments as indicated?

    • Hi Mariane,

      I think there are 2 parts to your answer:

      1. Modeling, have your children watch you adopt this manner of speech.

      2. Reframing, help your child reframe nagative questions into positive ones as part of a family project.

  4. Lionel Basque says:

    Ellen, thank you for the mails you send me. I find them very interesting and read them even if I don’t reply or give any comments.

    I would like to say that when we are looking for clothes in our homes or in the refrigerator we are not aware that our children are watching us and are modeling their lives while growing up.

    If we are saying something like; Saying a little bit loud, so the children can hear you, “How about trying to put together something we have in our closet and be creative while doing” it and they see you doing it, they will see this as an opportunity to demonstrate their creativity also. I did this many years ago with my son and sometime he would as me if what he was putting together looked cool.

    The same for food, when I see something in the refrigerator I take something out and will something to myself in an audible voice like; “This ice cream seems to be a little bit old but I will use it with a banana and some caramel and a few little pieces of nuts on top and it will be Yummmmy ”. A few weeks ago my son was around from university and was so tempted by what I was saying that he asked me to prepare a banana split for him also and wanted me to give him a surprise with the ingrediant added to it.

    Something easy to prepare, delicious and a way to entice you child into a conversation, while eating the things prepared around a fireplace or a wood burning activity outside like I did.

    Hope you have many great moments with your children while it is possible.


    Lionel Basque

  5. I am with you all the way Ellen girl!!! I know from experience this is truth and it works!!